"what are two negative thoughts you don't want anymore" I'm so tired of the doom and gloom. I'm tired of feeling like our society is careening to apocalypse, between the pandemic, climate change, neoNazis, etc. etc. it just all feels so hopeless all the time. a second thought I'm tired of is fear of aging. I'm trying to exercise and eat better, which goes okay-ish but sometimes when I get pains or have difficulty during or from working out, i'm concerned that my age is the problem.
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ugh.
What would make me happy right now? A new job. A purpose. A lack of anxiety. So many things. I feel lost. It's a new year. It feels wrong. Sometimes it feels like failure. I got this job I (kind of) wanted. I should've known better than to try out of desperation. But I guess part of me also thought maybe it would work out. Maybe it would be a new calling. Maybe it's because I went into knowing it wasn't the end goal? I don't know, but I need out.
february tarotscope
Source:https://visualmagic.info/portfolio/february-2021-tarotscopes/ Scorpio Queen of Wands What you deny yourself is often a symbol of that which could most break your heart. Going after the fire could also open your heart more than ever. An infusion of joy is on its way to you. Will you let it come in? You’ve been holding back on instigating a particular pleasure cascade. Why? There’s a part of you that is scared to begin letting yourself embody what you love. You fear that seeing yourself, or your first trial runs, as less than perfect will be far too much to bear. The last thing you ever want is to be embarrassed by doing something you care about so much, so imperfectly. The last thing you want to feel is shame or humiliation that is out of your control, made public, or traceable in some way. So denial becomes the norm until you sometimes even forget about what you even wanted in the first place. The Queen of Wands is the water of fire. February is a month where you can plunge...
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